Embrace – Don’t Hate: Diary of a [constantly] Angry Black Woman

What would the diary of a [constantly] angry black woman with a permanent attitude look like? What type of scenarios would she encounter on a daily basis? What type of people would she attract?

Well for one… she would probably be the type of girl (yes, “girl” because as a woman you have put childish acts & unnecessary drama behind you) that always walked around telling everyone that she “doesn’t get along with females” and the couple of “friends” that she does actually have probably act just like her, if not worse. She probably goes to work (if she has a job) and does the bare minimum and every time she is asked to do something, she gives a whole bunch of LIP… IF she has a man, she’s constantly nagging him and even though he’s a good guy, she’s always accusing him of doing something and nothing he does is ever right or good enough for her. She’s always the first one complaining and the last one taking action to correct whatever is going wrong. She spends her extra waking moments talking shit about other people and hating on other women, and before she goes to sleep at night when she looks in the mirror at herself – she’s probably completely unhappy with what she sees (because to genuinely share good feelings for and with another person, you have to feel good feelings for yourself FIRST). 

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So, why is it that women are SO quick to hate on one another? Why are there just some women in the world that are so EVIL and NEGATIVE that even if you handed them the world on a silver platter, would just never be happy? I’m convinced it’s an epidemic. I’ve witnessed a pretty girl walk by someone and all her & her friends can do is tear her down. The girl was on point, hair done, pretty face, body tight, cute outfit & rocking some BAD heels… But yet the first comment out of one of the girls mouths was “Ugh she thinks she’s cute” – or “Her hair isn’t real”, etc, etc… so many women are quick to rip each other apart when they sense someone is competition to them. This is a sign of inferiority, symptoms of jealously and definitely a whole lot of insecurity. It is impossible for someone who doesn’t truly feel confident in themselves and what they have to offer to feel GENUINE happiness for other people.  I’m sure we all have that friend that no matter WHAT you say to them about accomplishments going on in your life, they have to one up you and tell you what they are doing that is SOOO much better. Yep. That fits the insecure checklist too. Most likely, she’s probably friends with the girl I described first above. But, just know… the girl that walked by, you know the one that got hated ON – she has her stuff together, she’s happy, complete and full of life… oh AND the good man (that the negative girl is searching endlessly for) the positive girl's got him. Because she’s comfortable with herself and she knows that there will ALWAYS be someone better, prettier, freakier, richer, etc… but to TRULY be happy, you have to accept what you have, have confidence in it, and enjoy YOUR own life. The rest will fall into place naturally.

I will just never understand why so much negative energy is invested in hating on each other. Sitting on the metro yesterday I just watched the dynamics of groups of white people and black people (not to make this an issue of race, but this is just what I observed) – a group of white people introducing new friends to each other, shaking hands, sharing jokes, conversations about work, and in the end, they exchanged business cards with each other – Ding! Ding! Ding! – CONNECTIONS & NEW ASSOCIATES! Yet, time and time again, I see this situation replayed among black women and the closed-mindedness of them doesn’t allow them to even get as far as a simple conversation. We have got to do better ladies!! We need to work to build each other up and pull each other to the top instead of hating and spreading negative energy. If you see a woman with her hair looking good, COMPLIMENT her! Ask her where she got it done, so you can look just as nice. If you see a woman doing something positive with her life, don’t be JEALOUS! Ask how you can contribute and maybe she can help you work your way to that point. Use every opportunity in a positive way and you will reap positive rewards. Don’t nag your boyfriend about every little thing; pick and choose your battles! APPRECIATE him and what he does; our black males need to be built up because the world is constantly tearing them down (without any of that from us).

I could go on & on about this topic but seriously – remember KARMA is a never ending circle. You put positive energy into the world, it will return to you. And you never know who is witnessing your attitude… so from today on… 
EMBRACE, don’t hate :)